about
Snow saucers. Wonderful fun things. But sadly, unpredictable. I remember years ago......back in the stone age before Manny was born the squirrel and I got a saucer. We lived on a ravine back then and since there were so many danged trees it was hard to find a nice smooth strip of downhill.Each saucer path had to be carefully tested before an actual launch occured. Now, I'm not big on personal injuries and The Squirrel has always been an easy mark....er....I mean adventurous. So my friends and I used.........I mean to say, "allowed" her to test the hill for us.
Nothing like the feeling of flying down that hill, your saucer spinning out of control. Oh the rush of it.
My friends and I got Squirrel centered on her saucer, lined her up, and gave her a hearty push sending her flying down that hill......well....until she began to bounce off trees. I swear to you it was like watching a human pinball. (There were several oooo's and ahhh's from the crowd. And a couple of Ughs. But I think that was the Squirrel)
The ride came to an abrupt halt when her saucer collided with a giant wooden spool frozen in the middle of the creek below. I think that's when she started howling like a beagle with it's foot caught in a trap. All I know for sure is, I couldn't get her to stop all the way back home. It was horribly embarrassing.
By that time of course I knew I was a dead girl walking. The squirrel's favorite activity aside from following me around was "ratting me out". And the constant crying and sobbing was sure to end in great ass pain for me.
By this time you're thinking I'm gonna say ....but to my surprise she didn't squeal. Think again. She sang like a friggin canary. It took all of maybe 12 seconds before I heard my first and middle name come outa my Mother's mouth. Once the middle name is uttered, it's all over but the ice packs strapped to your bright red butt cheeks.
I don't remember exactly but I think it was about 48 hours before I could sit comfortably. meanwhile Squirrel was being served hot chocolate and crap. Geez. Try to show somebody a good time. And you all wonder why I hate winter.
At 11/28/2006 11:23 AM, 
barman
That reminds me of my experience. My Dad took me to a hill near the house. ALl the kids were flying down the hill. Good time had by all. I think we went down a few times then my Dad sent me down the hill on my nice sled. Down, down, down I went. Faster and faster I went and straight as an arrow I headed for the largest tree in the area.
I smashed into the tree head on and shed more than a few tears. I guess Dad must not have got into to much trouble over it as he still tells the story on occasion. Maybe my parents were trying to get rid of me! Crabs, you got room for me to hide out???
Oh wait, they like 100 miles away. I should be safe... I think.
By the way, I have had my hide tanned on more than one occasion and I am telling you, it is not fun what so ever.
` I hate being whipped. I remember how much my dad used to do that to me for NO REASON! There were more than a few times - as a teenager, even! - that I'd be asleep and then he would just come in my room (as I wasn't allowed to have a lock) and spank me so damn hard and yell at me for sleeping in the fetal position!
` Like, how am I supposed to know not to do something if I'm asleep? Well, that's DadLogic....
` Continuing on with my rant, I am surprised that it snowed here the other day. I was down at the school earlier, waiting to get in to take my test, but they never opened. I could not figure out for the life of me why.
` Then I noticed the snow. It wasn't on the road or anything, but that is enough to cancel school in Everett. Like, WTF!?!?!
` If they pulled that shit in Ohio, man, nothing would ever get done in the winter time! You know what I'm saying? Of course you do - you live there.
` Of course, I did, too. There was a really huge hill I sledded down a few times. Unfortunately, my sled kept stopping because it sucked, so I borrowed someone else's sled and fell off of it.
` You know, your story actually reminds me of this time where this one kid built a snow wall on a cliff in the neighbor's backyard and told me to ride my sled through it.
` He said it was really solid and tightly packed and that I wouldn't go through. Instead, I would stop really fast. Yeah, right!
` Smartly, I said; "Why don't you test it out first? Then maybe I'll believe you." Well, he went right through the ledge like it was nothing, off the cliff, and landed deep in a five-foot snow-drift!
` He wasn't really hurt, though, so I just laughed at him for being stupid. [/ rant]
` Ya just gotta watch out for the snow that's yellow! Didn't Frank Zappa ever teach you anything?
` Also, this is off-topic, but if ya wanna laugh your ass off, ya gotta see my collection of insane talking cat videos on my mad scientist blog!
` That an my bigfoot post below that. Some guy thought he took a picture of a bigfoot (which he didn't see in the first place) and I critiqued it, saying it looks like a rotted tree stump with moss growing out of it more than anything.
` And then he comes on my blog and leaves comments about how wrong I am! What a high honor!
Sal, sledding and saucering for sure are a winter highlight. No question.
Seequin, I did see the bigfoot post. I even posted on it. LOL! Didn't ya see me? How come everybody thinks bigfoot is an ape anyhow? I happen to know for a fact it's a woman Bob used to work for. Bleached out blonde, high maintenance kinda gal. Major player with I swear to you size 12 at least feets.
Sign, you are such a sweetie. I have no doubt I would have jumped first and then thought, "oh crap!" right after when I remembered my sister. LOL!
Kept, I fogot. You're a transplant, huh? I lived in Dallas for a year but it was under some hellish conditions. So I can't fairly say how I'd do there. But I do so love the Texans. My SIL lives in Austin and she loves it there.
Mone, the "little" one? Seriously? They're usually the ones you use for experimentation. I'm pretty sure that's what they're purpose in life is when your kids.
Manny, you have to hit refresh sometimes. We probably should switch to beta but I don't want eveybody to have to sign in all over. maybe they don't? I dunno. That's Milky's department. I'm just a grunt.
I guess I fail the sister test as I am accused of trying to kill my sister when we were small. She had a drape cord around her neck as she crawled away from the drapes. What? She did it, not me! Crabs I promise not to try that one on you, honest. Then again I doubt you crawl around all the much anyway.
Check your shoes before you leave.
ooh look, I am 1st. That story vaguely reminds me of the time my older brother talked me into closing my eyes while he pulled me on the sled, well the shit pulled right thru an icy, snowy, half melted ditch!! and when you remind him of that day, he has NO memory.