about
I am officially beginning a petition today, hereby, heretofore, towit, and too woot, to change Milky's poor Bob expression to.....Poor Pam, or Crabby if you prefer. They're both me. doesn't matter cuz I'm the good guy and I'm VERY easy to get along with.
I believe I can show you enough evidence today to prompt you to sign below and make that much needed change.
As you all know, I live in Ohio. And during winter that means S-N-O-W.
The photo you see here was taken a couple winters back when I (out of the goodness of my heart) went out to help Bob snow blow the driveway.
Note my squinty face. Know why it's all squinty? Suspicious why a pic was snapped right in that moment? Because BOB didn't tell me you could rotate the thing the snow blows out of so all the snow I was blowing was blowing right into my face. Mr. "I'm so innocent", thought it was pretty funny.
Recently (couple weeks ago) we had a snow and ice storm. The ice on our front door step hit in a drift. We had....and I swear I'm not making this up....probably 2 feet of solid ice mountain on the front step.
Being the kind and caring person I am, I decided to get out there and beat the hell outa that ice and knock it offa my doorstep. (I kept falling when I went out with Lucy)
So there I am...pounding away, lifting glaciers and hoisting them into the flower garden when suddenly the front door opens and there's Bob.
By the disapproving look on his face I knew...KNEW...he was concerned about me. After all, I was having blood pressure and pulse problems. I mean .... I was practically at deaths door. Really. Since Bob couldn't possibly live without me, it was only natural he'd be worried sick.
He opened the door and I prepared myself for him to lecture me and tell me how dangerous that was.
What he said was....... "You're using the wrong shovel! Get the square shovel out of the garage and use that. You can't use a snow shovel on ice. You're bending it all up!" Then he got his coffee (that I lovingly made) and disappeared back up behind his desk.
Ok...go ahead...sign in below. Any time. From now on it's "Poor Pam" and/or Crabby. Not, "poor Bob".
PS. Not to fret over any type of retribution from Milky.
She's all tied up right now .
Rox, get back here and help me get her back into that sani-potty. I'm havin a hell of a time holdin onto her.
STOP BITING DAMN IT!
Sorry, (pant pant) she's giving me a .....OW!
ROX??? WHERE'D YOU GO? JUST HELP ME GIVE A PUSH THROUGH THE DOOR, WILL YA?
Miss, thank you on the cow! I drew that my very own self. LOL! (it's true, I have now regressed allllll the way back to crayons and markers. But it keeps me quiet and out of Bob's way)
I can't see the last pick as it is on a server that is being blocked. :( I assume it is something being mean to Milkmaid. Of course I don't know if she deserved it or not.
I like that, Bob did not tell you about turning the shoot. Still you protest so much I just do not know if I can fell sorry for you. We will see.
Way to funny oh and love the new mast head. So perfect.
Man, stay away for a few days...
Love the cow, Crabby, and also the story of the snowblower chute. Now at my house, the chute-rotator-thingy is broken. Husband prefers a shovel, so the only way I will stop getting snow in the face is to load the damned thing on the pickup truck and drive it to somebody who can fix it. Have you ever tried to load a motorized something onto a pickup truck?
Ya know, if you're really pissed at Milkmaid, you could aim the snowblower chute at the porta-potty. Or maybe you could exile her to an ice fishing shanty over at my place.
Crabby feeds toilet paper under the door crack, dearly hoping she doesn't have a big mess to clean up inside.
Mone, THANK YOU! Gosh you guys are making my head swell. LOL! Babe, you are not missin a thing on the snowblower front...although...I must say, it's much better when the snow is blowing AWAY from your face.
G, thanks on the Pam. I've kinda been stuck with it for 55 years anyhow. Might as well learn to like it myself. I do like it's only one syllable.
Ya like the Horton's touch there? I couldn't resist. I would have added timbits too but she ran outa hooves.
Jodes, aw...it's nothin. I lock Milky in place all the time. LOL! ya have to if you wanna get away with anything around here.
Barman, Wow! Thanks on the header again. Maybe I'll start drawing all my headers. You would like he didn't tell me about that blasted thing. My face was soooo wet and cold by the time he finally told me. And his excuse???? "I kept thinking....she can't possbily be that dumb." Well, HULLO! I am that dumb. Besides it's a techie kind of thing and everybody knows I suck at techie.
Wize! There's a reason you are the supreme wise one. LMAO! I just spit water all over the keyboard at the suggestion of pointing the snowblower at Milky. In my head, I can see the porta potty slowly filling up with snow. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ha ha ha ha!
No way would I be able to load a motorized anything in the back of a truck. YIKES! Can ya duct tape it? I duct tape everything.
Milky, if you keep talking and unfairly influencing these folks I'm gonna duct tape yer little window shut. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ha ha ha.
HAHA! Ok you're going to laugh at me now but I'm going to be very brave (or foolish depending on your POV) - I have never seen a hand-held snow plough before so I was asking myself "Why in the heck is she trying to mow snow, shouldn't she wait until Spring when she can actually SEE her lawn?!"
Yup, cue laughter .......... release it .......... do you feel better now???
I'm going to go and hide for a while until someone else comes along that you can laugh at. It's much safer that way .....
Oh man Gareth, you have the kind of weather I only wish I had right about now. Over here we are a strange lot, at least those on the northern edges. We all mow white lawns.
Crabbs, not being married I have to ask. Isn't there something called spousal etiquete or something. I would think Bob is suppose to look out for you. Oh well, maybe he will end up in a sitiation like that and you will not warn him ...
At 3/09/2007 7:28 AM, 
MilkMaid
You shoulda let me outta here. I've decorated the place all up. Hung some jalapeno lights up, wrapped the light fixture in toilet paper, made some cute paper mache flowers out of toilet paper of course, and spit shined all the nice "chrome" fixtures.
Not let me the hell out.
And I posted a little something for you at my blog. Go see. GO SEE. I wouldn't make you cry or anything, go on. Trust me.
Check your shoes before you leave.
I shall sign.. Yes I shall..
and F YOU PEEPS!!
IM FRIGGIN FIRST..
you know why that is crabby baby.. its cause I rock.