Wednesday, April 04, 2007














My underwear! She ate it. I want it back. I swear she is making me crazy lately.

She has gnawed one end of that giant tree limb to a fine point. Jake brought the home-made doggie spear into the house for her while I was busy painting. Ten minutes later she began chasing us around with the damnable thing, tail wagging gleefully. Thanks to Jake I am now sporting an extra hole in my ass.

I took the stick away. She got bored and now she has eaten my unders right out of the laundry basket. My good ones! Oddly, she hasn't gakked them back up, which means they're most likely gonna end up out on the front lawn somewhere in a steaming pile of dog dung.

You'd think there would be something this dog can play with that she can't eat! But noooo. There's nothing. NOTHING she can't eat. She even eats my cooking! Nobody eats my cooking. You can break your teeth right off with a slice of my pot roast. But the dog likes it!

I have to go back now and finish painting my new office so I can move this stuff in there. Assuming she hasn't eaten the paint brush.
 
posted by Crabby at 11:17 AM |


25 Comments:


At 4/04/2007 12:58 PM, Blogger DirkStar

Can I order a pair of the undies?

If the dog loves em they gotta be tasty...

 

At 4/04/2007 1:01 PM, Blogger barman

Have you ever tried one of these?They do wonders for my brother dog, a wiemeranier, and he (the dog) is hard on them.

 

At 4/04/2007 1:22 PM, Blogger Crabby

Dirk, imagine a pair of undies with an air hold in the back and 1 full inch of elastic showing at the waist. Now I ask you....would you eat that?

Barman, yeppers. Got two of them. Keeps her busy for 10 minutes till she licks all the frozen peanut butter out of it.
She usually takes a couple of nice looong naps during the day. Lately, it's like she's been drinking coffee. She's all over the place and chock full of ideas.

 

At 4/04/2007 2:02 PM, Blogger Pat & Reg

Ya gotta give the dog credit. She knows a big knob when she sees it and obviously knows how to handle it!

 

At 4/04/2007 2:55 PM, Blogger Iris VonKornea

Oh for heavens sake, I thought my Dubbin was stupid.

 

At 4/04/2007 3:11 PM, Blogger SignGurl

Were your unders red, by chance?

 

At 4/04/2007 4:18 PM, Blogger DirkStar

Dragons baseball tomorrow night.

Season opener.

I have four seats behind home plate?

Interested in a road trip for baseball?

Five rows up, dead center...

Awesome seats.

 

At 4/04/2007 5:19 PM, Blogger Manny

LMAO, this reminds me of the new flash on Monday about the escaped prisoner. All the media talked about was the'shank' the guy used, waht a shank was and how one might go about making a shank.

So what if the guy snagged some poor lady along with her vehicle. So what if he robbed the same bank he was originally locked up for. So what if he busted into someones house. The media didn't give a crap about all that stuff. It was the 'shank' that peaked their interest.

And to think, Lucy has been smuggling them in the whole time. LOL This makes you an accomplis.

 

At 4/04/2007 5:20 PM, Blogger barman

Dirk, sounds like you may be in the same league as my team is. We have our opener tomorrow, the Lansing Lugnuts. Oh boy, rivalry.

 

At 4/04/2007 5:34 PM, Blogger SIMON

Ah leave the dog alone he's obviously got good taste!
Brits and pets hey? It's inbred!
I was really going to comment more like dirk_star but a dog, a pet, a Brit and you can see how it turned out.

 

At 4/04/2007 5:56 PM, Blogger Manny

Hey! I like the softer yellow more better.

I'm black and white now. Have you seen me?

 

At 4/04/2007 6:08 PM, Blogger wmy

We had a collie like that when I was younger. I swear, that dog would eat the underwear right off your ass if he thought he could distract you long enough!

 

At 4/04/2007 7:05 PM, Blogger barman

Wendy, you too? I never heard of dogs eating underwear before. There is not a dog alive that would dare grab a hold of my britches. :)

 

At 4/04/2007 7:10 PM, Blogger SignGurl

Dogs like women's underwear. I wonder why?

 

At 4/04/2007 9:30 PM, Blogger G-Man

Barman, You don't wear britches....

Thats cause Crabby's undies smells like.....
Tim Horton's..xoxox

 

At 4/05/2007 12:43 AM, Blogger Cazzie!!!

Buy her a small dog to play with..notwithstanding, she may eat it :( LOL

 

At 4/05/2007 6:31 AM, Blogger Crabby

Reg, All she knows is...if it can't run, eat it. LOL!

Iris, whatever we do, we must never allow Dubbin and Lucy to procreate.

Sign, did you find them?????? Are they...you know...icky now?

Dirk, love to! But...we're at the airport tonight to drop Jake off and then back home to run naked through the house like school kids. 5 days of hot smutty, monkey love. I even took an extra vitamin this morning. LOL!
We should get together soon though cuz shoot, we're neighbors! I had no idea you were that close.

Manny, would you believe I haven't seen the news since Bob got tivo?

Barman, the Lansing Lugnuts? ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh ha ha ha ha!

ebezp, LMAO! She's got no taste. This morning she tracked an ant all the way across the kitchen, then ate it. EWWWWWWWW!

Manny, I did see. I like it. I play with the colors all the time but I can't find one I like yet. Poor Milky, she'll most likely end up bailing me out again at some point.

Wmy, Lucy tried to use one of Bob's body parts as a tug toy when she was a puppy. He screamed like a little girl. Now she's not allowed anywhere near him when he's taking a shower. LOL!

Barman, trust me...Lucy WOULD eat your britches. In fact, she'd consider them a delicacy.

Sign, they also like men's socks. Which totally takes anything flattering out of the mix. And this one adores paper products. I had to pay $175 once for an X-ray after she ate a lead pencil. Bob practically snatched himself bald-headed when he heard what the bill was. Now whatever she eats, we just wait for it to come back out of one end or the other.

G, Barman doesn't wear britches??? For real? Do you have photos?

Cazzie, she had two. They're both gone now. LOL!
Naw, she didn't eat them. She likes little furry things.

 

At 4/05/2007 6:46 AM, Blogger Mone

You should her just let herself have that stick! It's your own fault, hahahaha.

 

At 4/05/2007 7:04 AM, Blogger MilkMaid

Poor Lucy....

There once was this man, Poor Bob, whose wife had a dog named Poor Lucy.....

 

At 4/05/2007 7:33 AM, Blogger Crabby

Mone, it's in the house now, where she can look at it and assure herself the bumpus hounds next door aren't over here stealing it. But she's only allowed to chew outside. LOL!

Tina, he's too young for you. But my Dad is still looking for comely lass to warm his bed.

Milky, Poor Lucy my foot. LOL!

 

At 4/05/2007 8:44 AM, Blogger Crabby

Tina, you have no idea how disappointed my Dad is gonna be. Not that he's desperate or anything. Well, ok. He is.

Is there any female out there at all, interested in an old scottish man with half a hearing aid? His dog ate the other half.

 

At 4/05/2007 8:50 AM, Blogger shirley

I'll do him.

 

At 4/05/2007 10:28 AM, Blogger Iris VonKornea

Crabby dear, Dubbin is so stupid, he actually had most of his dog penis loped off in an unfortnate accident involved that bitch Ruby Dean's walker. That evil douchebag pulled the balls off her walker and one of the legs was sharpened to a point, like a little shive. She watches too much HBO and I think that crazy old bag sharpened in herself.

Anyhow, Dubbin was snitching around her crotch, since it does smell like dead fish and he likes that, and Ruby Dean brough down that pointy walker blade across his dog bits and sliced off most of his dog bone and part of the two brothers, if you get my drift.

Her son Chester had to pay the veternary bills but it rendered Dubbin sterile.

Seriously, I think this is where Peter may have gotten the idea to chop off his... he was very suggestible to a lot after That No Good Bastard George Bush started launching scuds in the middle east and making people absolutely fucking crazy!

 

At 4/05/2007 10:42 AM, Blogger Crabby

Iris, does Ruby watch the Sopranos? If so, break her tv before one of you gals ends up in the trunk of a Cadilac.
Poor Dubbin. He must be so embarrassed. Can he still hump things? Or is it pointless?

 

At 4/06/2007 8:27 AM, Blogger Iris VonKornea

Oh, of course he is still humping whatever walks by, but he's not even shooting blanks. He's more like an air rifle that way. Like most men, as soon as they know their seed isn't going to take root, they start humping like there's no tomorrow, as if quantity will somehow override the lack of quality.

What the hell was I saying?

RODNEY! I need a new diaper!